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Thursday, September 2, 2010

A Confederacy of Dunces - The Most Sovereign Nation of Arizona - Tonight's Edition Joe Arpaio

"A firm rule must be imposed upon our nation before it destroys itself. The United States needs some theology and geometry, some taste and decency. I suspect that we are teetering on the edge of the abyss.”
- A Confederacy of Dunces
John Kennedy Toole
Abyss meet "America's Toughest Sheriff" Joe Arpaoi.

What is it about Arizona? Jan Brewer, the call to repeal the 14th Amendment (Arizona Republicans Seek To Tear Down Statue of Liberty) and then you have tonight's blue light special - Joe Arpaio.

Wikpedia says that Arpaio promotes himself as "America's Toughest Sheriff." He has become controversial for aggressive publicity seeking, retaliation against political enemies, abuse of power, civil rights violations, financial mismanagement, and his outspoken stance against illegal immigration. He has become a flash-point for controversy surrounding Arizona's SB1070 anti-illegal-immigrant act. He is currently the subject of FBI, United States Department of Justice, and Federal Grand Jury investigations for civil rights violations and abuse of power, and is the defendant in a federal class-action suit for racial profiling.

Sounds like a real stand-up guy.  Who could possible object to him?
"When a true genius appears, you can know him by this sign: that all the dunces are in a confederacy against him."
Epigraph by Jonathan Swift
Justice Joe is in the news again as the Justice Department has filed suit against obnoxious self-serving tyrant Joe Arpaio, sheriff of Maricopa County, for refusing to cooperate in a civil rights investigation.

Arpaio, who, with the help of his volunteer "posses", has been grossly overstepping using his authority for years, to imprison undesirables.  He's a proud practitioner of racial profiling, regardless of its legal status.

But the Justice Department's Civil Rights Division started investigating him last year "amid accusations of discrimination and unconstitutional searches and seizures related to the sheriff's immigration-enforcement efforts." Arpaio claims his office has been cooperating. The Justice Department's lawyers very much disagree, however, and they're tired of asking, and now they're just suing the asshole to get it over with:

The lawsuit comes after weeks of back-and-forth letters between the agencies, threats to strip the county of federal funding, and a meeting in Washington last week among attorneys to discuss the investigation.
A spokeswoman for the Justice Department has said this is the first time in the last 30 years that a police or sheriff's agency has refused to cooperate with a Title VI investigation. Thursday's action marks the first time the agency is suing to compel access to documents and facilities.
Hell why cooperate with that damn Federal "do nothing" Government.  Besides it is just a bunch of drug dealing Mexican terrorist he is abusing anyway (or at least that is what Joe is saying and the people who are "supporters of him").

Arpaio is quoted as saying: "All these people that come over, they could come with disease. There's no control, no health checks or anything. They check fruits and vegetables, how come they don't check people? No one talks about that! They're all dirty. I sent out 200 inmates into the desert, they picked up 18 tons of garbage that they bring in—the baby diapers and all that. Where's everybody who wants to preserve the desert?"

Thank you JOE.  Now the criminals are runnin' scared because they don't want to live in tents in the desert or wear pink underwear. Sheriff Joe is truly an American hero. He proves that if you can abuse your power and be an unrepentant asshole to minorities you can win the hearts of old white folks everywhere who just want to believe that even though they're sinking into an abyss of poverty they're still better than Mexicans.

Oh Ignatious Joe:

"I do admire the terror which Negroes are able to inspire in the hearts of some members of the white proletariat and only wish (This is a rather personal confession.) that I possessed the ability to similarly terrorize. The Negro terrorizes simply by being himself; I however, must browbeat a bit in order to achieve the same end. Perhaps I should have been a Negro. I suspect that I would have been a rather large and terrifying one, continually pressing my ample thigh against the withered thighs of old white ladies in public conveyances a great deal and eliciting more than one shriek of panic. Then, too, if I were a Negro, I would not be pressured by my mother to find a good job, for no good jobs would be available."
- A Confederacy of Dunces
Arpaio set up a "Tent City" as an extension of the Maricopa County Jail. Tent City is located in a yard next to a more permanent structure containing toilets, showers and an area for meals. It has become notable particularly because of Phoenix's extreme temperatures. During the summer of 2003, when outside temperatures exceeded 110 °F (43 °C), Arpaio said to complaining inmates, "It's 120 degrees in Iraq and the soldiers are living in tents, have to wear full body armor, and they didn't commit any crimes, so shut your mouths."

That is right.  Shut your fucking mouth.

What do all the limped wristed liberals say?  Why those lame unpatriotic Americans point out that the vast majority of inmates within Tent City have not been convicted; rather, they are merely awaiting trial.  Who needs that damn "innocent until proven guilty" mumbo jumbo.

But Justice Joe doesn't just mess with Mexicans, no.  If you get in his way he will bring you down too.

In 2008, a federal grand jury began an inquiry of Arpaio for abuse of power, in connection with an FBI investigation. Arpaio is being investigated for politically motivated and "bogus" prosecutions, which a former US Attorney called "utterly unacceptable". Phoenix Mayor Phil Gordon has called Arpaio's "long list" of questionable prosecutions "a reign of terror".

And with that "reign of terror" Justice Joe has become to some, a modern folk-hero.  A gun-slinging, Patriot of the white true Americans.
"I am at this moment writing a lengthy indictment against our century. When my brain begins to reel from my literary labors, I make an occasional cheese dip."

— John Kennedy Toole (A Confederacy of Dunces)
My prophecy comes closer and closer to reality: Arizona and Texas will join together in a New Confederacy and declare total war on reason.   Pass me the cheese dip!


  1. Fucking Brilliant!

  2. Hysterical article. You are so RIGHT and so much about Arizona's politics is so WRONG!

  3. I have only recently discovered your blog. Today's article is one of the most clever of all out there. The incorporations of Pulitzer Prize winning writing into contemporary political analysis is genius. Bravo!

  4. I love how you use the newance of the - "When a true genius appears, you can know him by this sign: that all the dunces are in a confederacy against him" - as a double entendre against him.


  5. I'd like to know what state you see as a law and order success. Are you thinking Illinois? I live in California, though I am in the process of extricating myself from it. I lived in a section of San Francisco that was overrun with gangs from central america. They appeared to have no fear of police, courts or penitentiaries.
    Sheriff Joe is old school, American law and order. People don't want to be locked up in his jail. In California, prison-time is a badge of honor.
    I think that the Left is just young and rebellious. The need to stand out with the most outrageous policy stances, and public expressions of magnanimity.
    Just watch your speed in maricopa County. Make sure you have proof of insurance for the car. Keep it simple. It ain't California where everything is normal.

  6. Thanks for taking the time to comment. I am sorry you have had such a bad experience with Ca.

    I wasn't trying to say another State's criminal justice system was superior to Arizona's only that the Arpaio abused his office and that the procedures used by Arpaio were discriminatory.

    Arpaio enjoys the spotlight and his motives seem questionable. If he was truly "law and order" then why violate State and Federal alws in the process. When you pick and choose which laws you observe and then claim to be law and order you are simply a demagogue.

    And I am sorry you have had trouble with gangs, but criminals are of all ethnicities. Is there some reason you choose to single out this one?

    In citing the paragraph from "A Confederacy of Dunces" wherein he describes the terror felt by the "white proletariat" of blacks for their simply being black, I was trying to draw attention to the fact that the hysteria over Mexicans seems to me to be no different.

    And this is America. I, nor anyone else, should have to fear that their civil liberties may be abused for simply driving through another part of America. This is not (at least yet) Nazi Germany.

  7. Speaking of California, the following is an excerpt from Reuters:

    Republican Meg Whitman has opened up a 7-point lead over Democrat Jerry Brown in their closely watched race for California governor, the latest poll of likely voters showed on Friday.

    Here is a link to an article in the LA Times on Jerry Brown:,0,6497103.story

  8. Great article. You have shown perfectly what a twisted red neck fuck that Joe Arpaio is. He should be behind bars.

  9. Joe Arpaio is going down. The bigot clearly has much to hide.

  10. Arpaio for vice-president on the Palin ticket.

  11. That would be a great ticket for the GOP to run with. The scary part is they could actually win an election with the IQ level of most tea baggers and the like.

  12. To the writer is this article: What inspired you to quote
    "A Confederacy of Dunces?" When was this book written and would you recommend it? I liked your article.


  13. Jenny Thanks for your comment.

    If I recall A Confederacy of Dunces was required reading material my freshman year of college. (1986)

    As you likley know, it was written by John Kennedy Toole and was published posthumously in 1980. (A quick google search should give you all the info you need, including Toole's tragic life.)

    "What inspired my usage?" I always loved the book. It came to mind as a no-brainer to reference in this posting regarding the "sheriff" Joe Arpaio who I find abhorrent. I hope and believe Arpaio will be looked upon in history as man who committed crimes against humanity.

    But to answer your question, YES, A Confederacy of Dunces is well worth a read. It is a classic. I need to read it again as it was so many years ago. Enjoy.

  14. I think you're spot on !!!! I'm just you think that the republican party is doing meth? They're so delusional...i thought delusional thinking was only attributed to the mentally ill......or meth heads...Please correct me if i'm wrong.

  15. The new news is out re: Proto-Brownshirt Joe - he's a criminal again!

    $80 million dollars of misused funds by ol' Sheriff Adolf? Time for him to go! Hope he enjoys the last-class treatment he thought would just be used against brown people.