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Monday, August 30, 2010

Mulit-tasking Masturbation - When There Is Just Not Enough Time In The Day

Paris Hilton and her boyfriend Cy Waits are just so ... yesterday - being arrested for cocaine possession and driving under the influence of drugs and alcohol (respectfully).

And we have all seen the tragic consequences of texting or tweeting while driving.

But you just can't slow down Colondra Hamilton.  Girl is busy.

The Cincinnati woman was pulled over during a traffic stop when cops noticed that she was driving a 2008 Pontiac with overly tinted windows.  When they looked inside, they noticed that her pants were unbuttoned and there was a vibrator on her lap.

After being questioned by the police, Colondra Hamilton admitted to engaging in "auto erotic manipulation," while watching a porno movie that was playing on a friend's laptop in the passenger seat! 

At least she wasn't watching some boring Disney movie with the kids.

She was arrested and booked on a misdemeanor for driving with "impaired alertness" and drug paraphernalia possession for a "broken piece of crack pipe" found in her purse.

Wow. Colondra was busy.

Watching a movie on her friend's lap top, a little "auto erotic manipulation" (I think she should get bonus points for coming up with such a masterful and enticing definition of "flicking the bean") and, perhaps, smoking a little crack.

That is multitasking madness.

Girls just want to have fun!

So what now?  Mother's Against Masturbation!
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5 comments:

  1. AnonymousAugust 30, 2010 at 10:48 AM

    hilarious "auto erotic manipulation." I at least pull over if i need to get off while driving. - Hot Rod

    ReplyDelete
  2. AnonymousAugust 30, 2010 at 10:51 AM

    I have received oral stimulation while driving. I am able to keep both hands on the wheel and eyes focused on the road. It's like using the speaker phone in the car.

    ReplyDelete
  3. AnonymousAugust 30, 2010 at 10:56 AM

    MAM - Mothers Against Masturbation! Fucking funny.

    Jill

    ReplyDelete
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